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BRAVE FAMILIES -THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO LONG-LASTING, LOVING RELATIONSHIPS

Book Description:  

“We are brave families, and our love encircles us through the darkest nights, empowering us and nurturing us with support from one another.” —Jean Voice Dart

In Brave Families: The Ultimate Guide to Long-Lasting, Loving Relationships, a diverse group of courageous authors shares heartfelt stories, practical wisdom, and transformative tools for navigating life’s greatest family challenges. From parenting and caregiving to adoption, divorce, disability, grief, identity, and healing from trauma, these stories reveal how ordinary people found extraordinary strength through connection, faith, community, and compassion. Whether your family is traditional, blended, chosen, foster, adoptive, interfaith, LGBTQIA+, or beautifully unique in its own way, this book offers guidance, encouragement, and hope for creating deeper, healthier relationships that stand the test of time.

As a valuable bonus, a comprehensive Brave Families Resource Directory is included at the back of the book, offering a curated list of worldwide organizations that address the ten essential challenges families face today.

CHAPTER 8
BEFORE I KNEW WHAT TRAUMA WAS
BREATHING BACK INTO THE SAFETY SOMEONE GAVE YOU|
Sandy Krzyzanowski, C-IAYT, E-RYT 500, CPT, AP

MY STORY

My parents survived a war, forced labor, and the uncertainty of a displaced

persons camp. Within five years, they had two children in the camp; the

firstborn was my sister, Helen.

I didn’t understand our history as a child, but I felt its echoes in our

home. I could sense a change of mood in the air—the tension as it grew. I

always knew when something was about to explode. I didn’t have words for

any of it then, but I learned early that Helen was my safe place.

My YogaFit® for Warriors Trauma-Sensitive Teacher training helped me

to understand the PTSD in our household and realize my parents had

absolutely no control over their short tempers and the ups and downs of

their moods. They did the best they could. They made their way forward,

their nervous systems taking in more than they could name. Learning about

PTSD came with compassion and pride for all my parents went through.106 • Before I Knew What Trauma Was

Included in my training was the Kaiser Permanente Adverse Childhood

Experiences study: potentially traumatic events occurring before age 18,

including abuse, neglect, and household dysfunction. These experiences

cause toxic stress, which can negatively alter brain development, health,

and behaviors, increasing risks for chronic diseases, mental illness, and

substance misuse in adulthood.

These impacts can be softened by positive childhood experiences that

foster resilience within safe, stable, and nurturing environments. Research

consistently shows the most powerful protective factor is the presence of

at least one caring, supportive adult. A secure attachment—whether to

a caregiver or another trusted, consistent adult—provides the essential

relational “back-and-forth” that helps regulate stress, build emotional

safety, and buffer a child from long-term harm.

For me, that was Helen, my eldest sister, who was 12 years older than

me. Helen’s connection to me as a caretaker started early. She babysat me

while Mom and Dad both worked. My dad often had two jobs at one time,

while my mom worked as a cleaning lady during the day.

I chose to love Helen for her best moments in my life, for her loving me

just because I existed, for the lifeline I didn’t know I desperately needed as

a child, but knew I felt safe and loved in her presence. What child doesn’t

need as much of that as they can get?

In the US? Get an autographed copy from me directly for $21.95 plus shipping (US only media mail). Outside of the U.S., please contact me for a shipping estimate and to place your order. I will then invoice you the correct amount. Thank you!