Welcome to “My Better Day” November newsletter!
Each month, “My Better Day” newsletter contains tips for your yoga practice, yoga quotes to bring yoga off the mat and into your life, affirmations to brighten your day and motivate, and more! It is my wish for your well-being that I send this newsletter to help make your day a Better Day!
In this issue: Yoga quote, Practice yoga pose, Meditation on the go, Chakrascope, Hand Mudra, Featured Card Deck and Quote, Healthy News, Featured Recipe, Favorite Yoga Music / DVD, Happenings at Better Day Yoga LLC, Final Relaxation Quote.
*By the way–this newsletter is one of the 8 part/posts newsletters. They took quite a bit of time so I began doing single post newsletters after the February/March 2014 newsletter. That being said, if you want all of the posts of one newsletter for the 8 part/posts, please hit the back button to go back to all the posts listed with the newsletter your’re reading. Hope that makes sense!
Namasté,
Sandy Krzyzanowski
Founder, Better Day Yoga LLC
“The manner of giving is worth more than the gift.”
—Pierre Corneille.
As the daylight hours shorten, we are reminded of seasonal changes, the approaching Winter Solstice, and the Holidays around the corner. For many it is a season of giving and receiving. Which do you get the most joy from? Giving or receiving? The St. Francis prayer says “For it is in giving that we receive.” So perhaps we can view giving and receiving as two sides of the same coin—the reflection of each other. Kahil Gibran has said “You give little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” Please allow me to humbly share my stories of both:
For those who know me, it may not come as a surprise to you that I like jewelry. I am not alone in this passion. I notice other’s jewelry constantly, giving compliments out whenever appropriate. Perhaps I am over-exuberant at times, which has garnered unexpected responses.
Several years ago I was simply curious as to what a cloth, strap bracelet’s “WWJD” meant on our waitress’s wrist. It must have been when that acronym first started, or I was just not in the know yet. Of course, it meant “What would Jesus do?” The waitress promptly took off the bracelet and gave it to me explaining that was the purpose of the bracelet—to give it away when appropriate. I wore that bracelet for a long time, and then it fell off without my noticing. Hopefully it was found by someone who needed its message.
The concept of giving something away when you deem it appropriate, without expecting payment, can be described as the “Pay it Forward” method. “The concept was ..described by Benjamin Franklin, in a letter to Benjamin Webb dated April 22, 1784:
I do not pretend to give such a Sum; I only lend it to you. When you […] meet with another honest Man in similar Distress, you must pay me by lending this Sum to him; enjoining him to discharge the Debt by a like operation, when he shall be able, and shall meet with another opportunity. I hope it may thus go thro’ many hands, before it meets with a Knave that will stop its Progress. This is a trick of mine for doing a deal of good with a little money.
“This song captures its meaning:
The refrain makes me cry every time:
You don’t owe me a thing,
I’ve been there too
Someone once helped me out,
Just the way I’m helping you
If you really want to pay me back,
Here’s what you do
Don’t let the chain of love end with you.
There’s a “Pay it Forward” foundation, as well as a “Random Acts of Kindness” foundation:
Sometimes the situation presents itself and you know what you have to do. I took a jewelry class once and my fellow classmate forgot to bring an appropriate stone to wire-wrap. I had brought my favorite lapis stone, among others, fully intending to use the deep blue lapis for myself. I knew if I didn’t give her my favorite one, it would nag at me later. She was very appreciative. (I’ve always loved blue stones. Blue stones activate the throat chakra of communication. My March newsletter had highlighted a wonderful yoga teacher/consultant that also happens to be able to see chakras, TeriLeigh. She had informed me that my throat chakra was my dominant chakra. Perhaps that’s why blue stones are my favorite. How about you? What’s your favorite colored stone?)
While the examples I share below aren’t examples of someone being in dire need of anything—it’s only jewelry—they are examples of random acts of kindness that warmed my heart. I hope you enjoy them.
It would be several more years before the unexpected generosity of a waitress happened to me again. This time we were eating at the now closed, Sydney’s restaurant on Grand Avenue in St. Paul, MN. Our waitress wore the most exquisite earrings. They were Damascene jewelry from Toledo, Spain. Damascene “Damasquinado de Oro or “Damasquino” is the art of decorating non-precious metals with gold. It has roots in the Middle Ages and originates from the oriental-style artisan work done in Damascus, Syria. The craft, perfected by the Arabs and brought with them to Spain, has remained virtually unchanged over the centuries.
The earrings she wore were of the “Renaissance motif” since they had birds and flowers on them. After a wonderful meal, she presented the bill and asked for my address so she could send a second set she’d purchased explaining that she’d bought two pairs when she was in Spain, and feels guilty she never wears them both. She was hoping I’d give them a better life so to speak, and expected no money for them. Needless to say I said I simply couldn’t, and that the compliment wasn’t given in the hopes of her giving her earrings to me. She persisted and insisted. So I likewise asked her to include her address so I could please at least send her some money for them. After much back and forth, she agreed and I subsequently sent her appropriate payment after receiving the stunning earrings in the mail. They’re beautiful earrings, and I still wear them to this day.
Fast-forward a few years and my husband and I are, again, eating at a wonderful restaurant, Biaggi’s Ristorante Italiano, that offers a full, fantastic gluten-free menu (we are both gluten-sensitive). We tend to get attached to good waiters and waitresses, and this location is no exception. The waitress, “Cat” has become our favorite and we request to be seated in her section whenever we go there. She watches out for us like we’re family, and has the personality of the sister you wish you had.
As I already confessed in my October newsletter, I like big, honking costume jewelry rings. Cat, being the perceptive waitress that she is, took note. One time when we came for dinner, she presented me with a black onyx ring she hadn’t worn very much since big rings just weren’t her thing. Again, I argued that I couldn’t take the gift, but she insisted explaining that the ring wasn’t getting the wearing it deserved. She simply hoped I would like it and that it would bring me “good energy”.
We’d discussed the “metaphysical” meaning of stones in a previous conversation, so she was worried that black onyx might not bring good energy! I explained that all stones have good qualities. Black onyx happens to be a good grounding stone—see the Chakra section highlighted next for more on grounding! It also enhances self-mastery, steadfastness, and determination—setting one’s mind to a task. It actually absorbs the negativity of others and is a good protection stone from negative forces and influences. (Another great book on the subject is Love is in the Earth, A Kaleidoscope of Crystals, by Melody.) So she had nothing to worry about! This was an excellent ring to pass along! (Was the Universe telling me I needed some protection?)
We added to the tip to cover what we thought would be a good value for the ring. She tried upon our next visit to repay us. You have to love her warmth and generosity, as well as her attention to detail when it comes to serving our food!
Yes, it happened again within the last year and involves yet another wonderful waitress at the Claddagh Irish Pub—really I’m thinking I should write a book on how to acquire jewelry by the compliment method; or better yet, perhaps a book about the waiter/waitress profession attracting the most generous, kind souls I’ve ever run across.
This waitress had on a gorgeous glass bead bracelet in beautiful green colors strung on elastic for easy wear. Similar to other examples, when she presented the paid bill, after we already charged it to our credit card, she enclosed the bracelet within the black vinyl folder containing our receipt and card. I rushed up to her explaining, yet again, that I didn’t intend for her to give me the bracelet! She insisted. I looked first at my husband and then down to the three beaded bracelets I’d recently bought (twice—more on that in a moment), and he nodded. I promptly removed my three bracelets and handed them to her asking her to accept my bracelets as an exchange. She was thrilled.
The three bracelets I’d given her were hand-painted beads made of organic material that I can’t recall. I think they were seeds of some sort, or perhaps wood. I’d recently purchased them at the St. Croix Winery spring festival. The three strands were one each of red, orange and yellow. Being the Chakra lover that I am, I was attracted to all three colors that were available since they represent the base Chakras, Grounding (root) Chakra, Creativity (sacral) Chakra, Will-power (solar plexus) Chakra. I had only just purchased them and was browsing the rest of the booths when a little girl of about five or six in another booth was admiring them on my arm. I noticed they matched her cute outfit and I pulled them off and put them on her hand. She ecstatically showed her mother, who was watching and gave me a big thank you. Still attached to them, I went and bought another three bracelets. Little did I know the Universe did not intend for me to own these for very long either, as it was only a short time later that I gave them to the waitress at the Claddagh Irish pub!
You know I’m always looking for messages from the Universe. I was in amazement that the red, orange, yellow “Chakra-colored” bracelets kept flying off my arm even though I thoroughly adored them. Then it hit me. The bracelet I traded my second set of Chakra-colored bracelets for was green. Green is the color of the next Chakra up the Chakra ladder. It’s the color for the heart Chakra and is considered the bridge between the lower Chakras and the upper Chakras. According to Caroline Myss, author of Energy Anatomy, because the lower three chakras all relate to our physical experience and the upper three chakras relate to our higher levels of consciousness and spirituality, the heart connects our physical self and our spiritual self.
The heart Chakra is the largest Chakra in my logo because it is my commitment to teach yoga from my heart to the hearts of my students. It is said that we ascend up the Chakra ladder clearing energies as we go. At the time I received this green bracelet, I had recently quit my full time job to teach yoga and meditation techniques full time. Just prior to that I’d had a talented graphic designer create my vision of the logo you see for Better Day Yoga. I secretly wondered if the Universe was acknowledging my intent and I was humbled by the thought.
It is always a thrill to receive an unexpected gift. Most of my examples were from waitresses I’d just met. The most precious part of these stories is that someone who just met me felt enough warmth and kindness toward me after only a few brief exchanges. What aura am I putting out that I will give a good home to unworn jewelry? Why choose me instead of a well-known friend or relative? I am humbled and honored to be the recipient of these random acts of kindness and beautiful gifts.
The manner of giving was worth more to me than the gift, as the opening quote says. Of course, I love the jewelry. I wouldn’t have complimented them if I didn’t! But it was the manner in which they were given to me that still brings tears to my eyes when I recall the stories. For those of you who can remember the actress, Sally Field’s, acceptance speech for her Oscar as best actress in 1985, it was like that for me each time I received the unexpected jewelry—“They like me. They really like me!”
The kindness of strangers touches our hearts in a unique way. Doesn’t it? We all intuitively know this. Consider the last time you presented someone with an unexpected gift. Wasn’t the joy of giving enough to make you want to do it again and again? Being on the receiving end is obviously wonderful. My husband and I have also been secret gift givers which has brought us much joy.
Those who know us know that Christmas is our most favorite time of year. We simply love the magic of this season! I have believed in Santa Claus since I can remember. I even gave a speech in college about believing in Santa and quoted The Statler Brothers. “There are those who don’t believe in miracles or Santa Claus, but I believe what I believe and I believe in Santa’s cause.” –The Statler Brothers
Most especially during the holidays my husband and I find ourselves out and about either gift buying, or traveling to relatives. So we end up eating out while we’re on the road—which is where we meet all those wonderful waitresses! We usually like to find either an older couple out enjoying each other’s company, or a young family with a child or two. We’ll ask our waiter or waitress if we can pay for whatever they order so long as it’s kept a secret, and promise to give a good tip to the attending waiter or waitress. We ask them to tell the couple or family that it’s from their Secret Santa, and we “hightail” it out of there before they wonder why they aren’t getting a bill.
Each time we do this we giggle like little kids as we leave the restaurant wishing we could be a fly on the wall to see the reaction. Sometimes it’s better just to imagine it whatever way you want.
Over the years, I’ve dwelt on the random acts of kindness I’ve just shared. They are different than pre-planned gift giving. They are magical. I give a compliment and receive a gift; I give a bracelet and receive the smile of a child’s thanks. We give a free meal and receive a warm fuzzy feeling and a smile from the waiter or waitress about to put our plan into action. Giver or receiver—Who is luckier? Who feels the most joy?
“By receiving you replenish yourself and balance the male and female energies within and around you. By allowing yourself to receive, you swim in the flow of life, which washes away stagnant energy, bringing in new forms of abundance, creative ideas, and all types of opportunities. Even the simplest act of receiving is healing, and it is a powerful step in the manifestation process.” Guidebook for Magical Mermaids and Dolphins, Doreen Virtue, PhD.
“Numerous scientific studies show that acts of kindness result in significant health benefits, both physical and mental. Here are some key points:
- Helping contributes to the maintenance of good health, and it can diminish the effect of diseases and disorders serious and minor, psychological and physical.
- A rush of euphoria, followed by a longer period of calm, after performing a kind act is often referred to as a “helper’s high,” involving physical sensations and the release of the body’s natural painkillers, the endorphins. This initial rush is then followed by a longer-lasting period of improved emotional well-being.
- Stress-related health problems improve after performing kind acts. Helping reverses feelings of depression, supplies social contact, and decreases feelings of hostility and isolation that can cause stress, overeating, ulcers, etc. A drop in stress may, for some people, decrease the constriction within the lungs that leads to asthma attacks.
- Helping can enhance our feelings of joyfulness, emotional resilience, and vigor, and can reduce the unhealthy sense of isolation.”
Perhaps Leo F. Buscaglia said it best: “The fact that I can plant a seed and it becomes a flower, share a bit of knowledge and it becomes another’s, smile at someone and receive a smile in return, are to me continual spiritual exercises.” I wish you a season of magical gifts both given and received.
